Sunday, March 4, 2007

Emotional Cover Up


Number 2 - Hands, originally uploaded by Tin Green.

I'm still adapting to the new the art style of blogging. Blogs are a conglomeration of so much that attempting to utilize the entire canvas of the blog can be overwhelming at times. At this point, I've observed or seen that blogs contain a mix 0f social interaction, journalism , Internet bravado, Internet Arcania, self-disclosure, self-obscurement, scholarly discourse, visual elements (of which I'm particularly fond), audio (a future goal of mine), prose forms, poetic forms, serialized fiction, non-fiction, diary/journal entries, humor, hate, compassion and on ad infinitum.

Each blog has its own personality and style that reflects its creator(s) creative vision. I definitely have a vision for where I want to go with my blog and the pressure I feel and the comments from the readers provide a fantastic impetus for propelling me forward in realizing something that fifteen years ago, I would have seen as a complete pipe dream. I am constantly concerned about the quality of my blog and have continued to add (particularly this last week) to posts saved as drafts that I am working on.

Today's post I'm writing without edit and in a stream of consciousness burst, mostly because I've felt like I've been silent too long. From my last post, I'm assuming that it is kind of obvious that I was feeling a little down and publishing to the blog during that time would have felt a little like exposing myself (thus the tenuous connection to the picture for this entry, which is a female and I justify that depression is a manifestation of my feminine side) and instead I decided to cover up in silence.

I know and am grateful for the readers I have accumulated so far. Besides exploring my own creativity, the blog provides me feedback on my ability to communicate and connect. Reviewing old posts and ideas, gives me a version of my creative self that I can continue to develop and explore. I blog for creative expression primarily. I blog some for social interaction and a some for dealing with personal issues that are close to me. The creative expression obviously includes aspects of the artist -- blogs are our digital shadows cast on the concrete of the Internet.

What does your shadow say about you?

10 comments:

JulieAnn said...

TW
NOT jumping on any sort of soapbox here, just genuinely wondering why you refer to your depression as your feminine side? Emotional?

My shadow...my shadow has shadows. We'll see what I uncover when I turn on the lights.

Is this a challenge to your fellow blogger to own their shadows?

What say you?

Sister Mary Lisa said...

I like your stream of consciousness writing as much as your other writing.

It is fascinating to read others' blogs and wonder about what they are divulging and what they are hiding.

I wanna know the answer to what JA asked as well...

T Wanker said...

I said that depression was my feminine side or otherwise, I couldn't have posted the picture. Just a little more seriously, depression for me cycles and I relate my depression to the moon where it ebbs and flows in my life. The moon is a classic feminine symbol and so I relate my depression to my feminine side of cycling and revolving change.

Didn't mean to step on any feminist toes.

Sure, I would say it is a challenge to anyone to explore and understand their shadow. I'm a fan of Jung-ian shadow exposing.

And SiMLey, Thank you for giving my stream the OK.

T Wanker said...

Hey, I meant

SMiLey -- a dyslexic moment. I've been doing that a lot lately -- a sign of age maybe?

JulieAnn said...

Not a sign of age....SRS (Sperm Retention Syndrome). It's quite common...

BTW,you didn't step on my toes; I was just curious.

xoja

Sister Mary Lisa said...

I just feel special that you gave me my own "nickname"! Yesssss. I feel like I've arrived.

:)

PS, the dyslexic version was read by me as correct - I didn't even notice it didn't say SMiLey until you pointed it out...I just read it that way to begin with. Maybe I've got old age problems too.

Anonymous said...

Sperm Retention Syndrome? Hmmmmm....

T Wanker said...

Yeah, maybe Sperm Retention Syndrome is the reason I'm doing political posts.

You'd think with all this spring weather I'd be feeling like doing more sexy posts, but alas, I've been getting hotter about politics than sex.

JulieAnn said...

Well THAT'S sort of disappointing.

T Wanker said...

Hey, if you don't feel sexy -- start writing sexy.

MORMON EROTICA

The blog is devoted to exploring sexual issues arising out of American and Mormon culture. While the prurient may occasionally surface and while the tone may be sarcastic or sacreligious, the discussion is serious. I want to get deep.